I don’t want this blog to become a place where I only express how challenging my situation is…I have gained some perspective over the past year. I am not naive enough to think that I am the only one with life-changing trials. We all have something. Something that forces us out of what is comfortable and we have to either give up or step up to the challenge.
In many ways my life is really great and you could say I have a lot of “first world problems” like many moms out there, I wish my house were cleaner, I wish I exercised and ate better myself, sometimes I get mad because the wireless internet it cutting out during my favorite shows on hulu…it can be rough.
How grateful I am that I have always had the deep-seeded desire, no matter how hard things have gotten, to improve my situation. I feel it is definitely been a gift of the spirit. No matter how many times I fall down in failure, I have this desire to learn from my mistakes and do better. Such a blessing, for which I can take no credit.
I have a strong bond with my husband. Special needs children can take their toll on marriage, but we have made a concerted effort to always take timeouts from the children when we start taking our frustrations out on each other. I could not have made it without the loyal support of Adam who was willing to make all the lifestyle changes necessary and to work hard to make it possible for me to stay at home.
We are in our own world. When it is just the 4 of us at home, we sometimes don’t even think about the fact that our children are so different from other children their age. They have their own quirky personalities and they know how to entertain us and make us laugh. They love listening to Adele and Michael Buble music and having their own little dance party. When I think about it, it is almost like we have our own inside little language with them. We take cues from them, we mimic each other back and forth, we tickle and laugh and play…that’s all any other regular family does, right?
How thankful I am that both of my children have healthy, strong bodies. They are able to walk, run, dance, see, hear, throw, hug, kiss, and their potential for growth is immense. We took them for their very first official swim lessons the other day. I, of course, was a little anxious of how it would go. I had questions running through my mind of how they would react around the new teacher? would they understand instructions, let alone follow them? would the cacophony of noise and other kids be overstimulating? would they be afraid of the deep water? what would I do in case of a tantrum?
Max met the teacher first and Adam went in the pool with them. She eased all of my fears the moment I met her. She works with special needs children often and reassured me she would just push Max as far as he would let her. She got him used to the pool(they both had only been in a pool one other time last summer) and she was able to help him do a lot of different activities and he was calm and seemed to be having a good time. He especially loved the big slide!
Dempsey, whom I was most worried about, had to wait her turn on my lap. Waiting patiently is difficult for any 2.5-year-old, but especially for Dempsey. She has a fiery, strong will(which I always attribute to her redheaded father) and since she has no words to express herself, screaming is usually her medium of choice. Surprisingly, she sat on my lap and just kind of took everything in until it was her turn to get into the water. I’m sure it won’t be so pleasant next time, because now she knows what to expect.
I’m so excited to see what changes the summer has in store for them!